I don't enjoy much about Celtic these days. Goals, wins, leagues and trophies can mask a lot of things if you let them and quite often, I have. The matchday experience, especially at Celtic Park, was my Celtic joy. I should be in my 43rd year of attending matches (You know what I mean) and I still got a buzz from travelling to and seeing the ground before a game.
I have my routine for games, with my wife, and it was like a Lourdes for me that cleansed me of all the shit we as fans have to put up with. I say that knowing full well that you don't have to suffer it. You see there seems to be a small but vocal part of the Celtic support who have the ability to put up with anything.
And I don't just mean crap performances and defeats.
Any kind crap out of the club and they are out with their shammy leathers, polishing like a quality Curling team and pouring scorn on anyone who doesn't like the gleam they provide. They seem to have an inordinate ability to hear a Neil Lennon press conference and not react yet are triggered by anyone who even thinks about questioning something the manager has said.
Ditto when it's club propaganda.
An increase in season ticket prices during a pandemic? well, you don't have to buy one. Hard to get a refund for last season? How dare you apply for one in the first place. (At this point, I take my hat off to that kind of brass neck. Would be a gleaming neck too obviously)
No amount of changed kick off times to working hours, hampers for the chosen few or jaunts to Dubai that cost us £400k and most of our team seems to register a blip with their heart rates and you know what? I am jealous.
I am jealous of the fact these folk can let these things wash over them as if they are swimming in the Caribbean and I want a piece of the action.
You see, whilst it was good and somewhat unexpected to see Celtic win a game comfortably last night, increasingly, I am finding myself driven absolutely fucking bananas by Celtic and, frankly, I feel like I am heading for an early grave,
So please, pretty please, anyone, let me know how you do it.
For the good of my health.